‘Can there exist, in principle, a proper beginning to any story at all? Isn’t there always, without exception, a latent beginning-before-the-beginning?’
Amos Oz
She lucky to have such a good bunch. Virtually all of my so called friends disappeared once I was ill. One comment from over 10 years ago still smarts: ' What is REALLY wrong with you anyway ?' said in an irritated and exasperated voice.
I wonder how her husband feels...useless and unproductive, frustrated and alone ? Still she and the children need to keep going and the allottment time must be a godsend.
Family life can be tough when one of you is chronically ill
Hey Cusp, I think with this illness we all have faced at some point the falling away of friends or family... there are still a couple of people I cannot forgive from the 80s and I simply no longer speak to them. Long-term illness creates dependency and a lack of power... this can have ugly consequences. I think this allotment is quite a treasure! The writer sounds like she has a good head and loyal friends. I think it is good the article is more from her p.o.v than the ME sufferer, reminds us that the whole family suffers, not just the one who has ME.
You are right, Mim. It is hard to ask, but if you don't ask people don't know you need help, I am terrible at asking outside of my family!
Greenwords, Gardening is therapeutic in many ways! I can only potter - and always pay for it - but it is sheer nourishment, and if you can combine with family & friends so much the better!
5 comments:
She lucky to have such a good bunch. Virtually all of my so called friends disappeared once I was ill. One comment from over 10 years ago still smarts: ' What is REALLY wrong with you anyway ?' said in an irritated and exasperated voice.
I wonder how her husband feels...useless and unproductive, frustrated and alone ? Still she and the children need to keep going and the allottment time must be a godsend.
Family life can be tough when one of you is chronically ill
Hey Cusp, I think with this illness we all have faced at some point the falling away of friends or family... there are still a couple of people I cannot forgive from the 80s and I simply no longer speak to them. Long-term illness creates dependency and a lack of power... this can have ugly consequences. I think this allotment is quite a treasure! The writer sounds like she has a good head and loyal friends. I think it is good the article is more from her p.o.v than the ME sufferer, reminds us that the whole family suffers, not just the one who has ME.
So helpful, this post. Reminds me to ask for help even when I am afraid of asking. Some people will come through, others won't.
Lia is insightful.
I'm so glad they were able to find a way to keep their allotment as an important and nourishing part of their lives.
There is also an excellent post by Lia Leendertz about her husband's ME diagnosis on her blog 'Midnight brambling': Rescued by a pile of sticks
You are right, Mim. It is hard to ask, but if you don't ask people don't know you need help, I am terrible at asking outside of my family!
Greenwords, Gardening is therapeutic in many ways! I can only potter - and always pay for it - but it is sheer nourishment, and if you can combine with family & friends so much the better!
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