Sunday, 12 November 2006

The Quite Lovely Craig Ferguson

I remember when lovely Craig Ferguson was doing stand-up in Scotland as Bing Hitler, but now he is famous and shiny in America, taking the piss out of Rummy.


Craig Murray said...

He is very good. Great first name too.

You write beautifully, and I just wondered if you had thought of bringing out your book on lulu,com? It's not as good as getting properly published, but it does mean that we who want could buy it. I have just been reading through the extracts you have posted so far. It make me feel guilty because I've just got offers for two more books I haven't even written yet, and compared to you I write like a donkey.

See - what a rubbish metaphor. Proves my point, I suppose.

PS the first rejection I got for Murder in Samarkand said "I can see why Mr Murray would want to write this book. I can't see why he thinks anyone would want to read it."

nmj said...

Hey, I'm naturally suspicious, so am not sure if the above is from Craig Murray, am not sure why anyone would pretend, just there is so much not to trust on internet. Still, thanks for your kind words. Sadly, beautiful writing was not enough to nab publishers, Lulu is still a possibility, am not sure though. I'm thinking now I should have made the main character (who is based on me) mixed race (as I am) then they would've been slobbering over it! If you *are* Craig Murray, sorry for doubting, I enjoyed seeing you talk in Edinburgh last summer, though I found it hard to rid my head of the image of torture by boiling for a while. I had just started your book a couple months ago when the library recalled it, there was a waiting list - I will definitely go back to it. And if you are not Craig Murray, well, I guess it doesn't really matter! (And I don't believe you think you write a like donkey.)

craig said...

It is me, honest. If I were a stalker I'd pretend to be someone much more glamorous.

OK, I don't really think I write like a donkey. But I am very clumsy writing about emotions which you can colour so beautifully. See? I sound cheesy even when trying to write about writing about emotions.

You are probably right - mixed race is dead fashionable. If it doesn't make it all too painful for you, then recast it closer to yourself. If you can't get your ideal book published, salvage something worthwhile and get that published.

I must be the worst person in the World to give career advice! Sorry.

If you send your address to, I'll send you a copy of "Murder" to make up for the unhelpful librarian. Delighted to hear that a library had it, though - very few seem to.


nmj said...

Well, I guess you must be Craig since you have same email as his website. I was really being tongue-in-cheek about the mixed race thing, it would do little to enhance the spirit of my book, but it would make it more marketable & remove the 'tricky to market' label they used to justify not taking me on even though they loved the writing (though one labelled it as 'sick-lit' which peeved me). What really got to me was the agent dropped me once the mainstreams didn't bite, instead of submitting to small presses on my behalf...I blogged about getting 'Murder in Samarkand' from the library a while ago, but I deleted it cos I thought it was boring, not your book, my mini-drama of losing the book after checking it out! I will add your website to my blogroll.