I love the evening light, I went into the garden the other night, just to look. In a corner, some beautiful wee blue flowers are pushing through, my neighbour gave me the seeds some time ago. They grew into a gorgeous carpet last year. I'm so pleased to see them coming back. This night I stared, I'd forgotten completely their name. I crouched down (my back stabbed me, which I did not like one bit) and touched them and wondered: what the hell are you called? This is what is meant by cognitive difficulties and M.E, it's not normal absent mindedness, it's like part of a database has been erased. There's a hole where the word should be. I can be in a roomful of people and suddenly not know the name of someone I've known for years. Anemones. They are called anemones.